Information Overload!

Yesterday's meetings with the neonatologist and surgeon went well. We got "some" answers to our questions but it basically still boils down to how well are his lungs developed (we won't know until he arrives) and how quickly he is able to be stabilized (again, won't know until he gets here). The neonatologist informed us that little man will basically be delivered, intubated, say a quick hello and then be whisked off to be fully assessed. He will then be placed on a ventilator and lines placed to monitor him. Best case scenario-he stabilizes and will have surgery within 24-48 hours. Continue to stabilize, be weaned off the vent, figure out how to eat from a bottle or nurse and then he comes home to us (I make it sound like a short process but obviously not that short!) If not-then...a lot of other stuff. One possibility if he is unable to stabilize is for him to be placed on ECMO (a heart-lung bypass machine that oxygenates his blood and allows his "squished" lung some time to develop. 50% of diaphragmatic hernia patients have to be placed on ECMO and 50% of surgeries take place while on ECMO). If he is placed on ECMO then he will remain on there for 5-7 days before surgery. If he improves, then he will come off of ECMO and then surgery will be done. Probably the worst case situation, besides the obvious, would be him going on ECMO, not improving and having to have surgery while on ECMO. You have to be on blood thinners to be on ECMO and obviously having surgery while on those is very risky. All of this to say...there are a WHOLE LOT of what ifs and situations I could spell out for you-but it is still apparent that the first 24-48 hours are most critical. The surgeon was absolutely wonderful. He drew us diagrams on the exam table paper and gave us 2 dates that would be best for a c-section. (both the Neonatologist and surgeon recommended a c-section so that everyone could be in the same place at the same time and be ready for my little man!-I sure hope he doesn't expect this much attention at home!) He told us that Preston Banks' liver still being down is a huge plus. He also said that the fact that this obviously developed later and the hole is not "huge" are very good for us. When we asked the neonatologist he said that there is approximately a 60% survival rate and didn't really break that down. When we asked the surgeon and told him the percentage we had been given previously, he said yes BUT...-he said that the 3 factors listed above (liver down, later developing, and smaller hole) it would be closer to 80%.

So, for those of you who are mom's, and those of you who aren't, this mama is all over the place right now. I'm stuck between how in the world do you prepare your heart for the possibility that God could chose to take Preston Banks' home with him, or he could chose to keep him here. How do you prepare your heart for all of these what ifs and inbetweens...I still don't have all of the answers and I know I never will. But I DO know that God has continued to give me enough strength and grace for each minute...and when I try to get too far ahead and plan-my mind gets out of control! So here's the verse I am claiming and hope it will mean something to all of you other "planners" out there! :)

"You will keep him (her) in PERFECT PEACE, whose MIND is STAYED on YOU, because he TRUSTS in YOU! Isaiah 26:3 Emphasis obviously mine but I'm clinging to this truth-thanks for all of your prayers for us and for my Nana...I am blessed to have all of you in my life!